I heard the following recently…..which I thought was interesting:

1. As a result of the smoking ban in pubs and clubs a strange phenomenon is occurring….. it appears that we can now smell the urinals…..how we missed that odor…..new business opportunity I hear you say…..

2. And it seems we also forgot to notice that we ourselves actually smell when we perspire (in the case of men sweat) (I was told a long time ago that Ladies perspire…..horses sweat…..) and so, as we merrily dance the night away, our carnal odors become more prevalent.

3. And the smoking ban has created a massive industry for those palm tree type external heaters…..there are those who are preoccupied with the energy being consumed…..

4. And the fact that we don’t smoke on airplanes anymore seems to be positive…..planes actually consume something like 30% less fuel as a result, which is logical when we consider that we were transforming the external air at 11.000 feet up (temperatures way beyond Siberia…..) and this cooling process was a very high energy consumer…..

Share This

Comments(0)

This is good….very good….

You may have read my comments on The Portuguese Terrorists….. well it seems as though I have entered into the ranks of this rear breed.

There I was, taking a quiet stroll down to the Algarve on a very rain Monday morning, taking more than my usual care as a result of the climatic conditions. Having negotiated 205km of the 250km journey, I saw a police car on the inside lane, traveling no more than 90km per hour.

I continued doing my 120ish…..with others both to the inside and other calmly passing me on the outside. Passing some roadwork’s on the inside lane and soon after, I was pulled over by the police.

What on earth could I possibly have done wrong…..there was hardly anyone on the road so I guess it was serious…..drug smugglers no less…..anyway, you guessed it…..I travelled for 5km in the middle lane of a 3 land motorway…..and this deserves a 60 Euros fine.

When I asked the police about the people that were over speeding to my right, he said that as he was not fitted with the necessary speed equipment, it was not possible for them to do anything about it…..
This is what they call in Portugal…..“A Logica da Batata”…..The Logic of the Potato……

Share This

Comments(0)

I left this one for last cause it’s a bit tricky…..

And happening at the time in late August early September 2006, where just days before the Sun headlines said 27.000 Expected, 276.000 Actual….or something like that…..what we are being told is that there are foreign Europeans moving to…..yes England…..like, no where else……and according to a brief conversation with a girl from Manchester…..(don’t ask me how we got on to that subject in 3 minutes), it seems as though they are all heading to….yes, Manchester.

If you want to scare people, tell them they are loosing their jobs and there quality of life is being threatened……by Eastern Europeans…..it used to be the West Indians in the 50’s and 60’s.

I have to say that I am European and this attitude shocks me in this 21^st Century. It’s almost like, as long as the world can provide my comfort, then geopolitical issues shouldn’t change my immediate surroundings.

Europe is on the move and we are improving the quality of lives of millions of people. Am I worried about the Romanian, Latvians, Bulgarians, etc travelling around Europe….yes!! Why?? Because they are leaving major problems back home in their own country. The majority of people on the move are young, very qualified professionals, looking to create a better life for themselves and their families. They work very hard, lots of the time exploited, work crazy hours, for comparitively low wages and then they are called all sorts of names. They live under fear of exportation every minute of the day. And they are not appreciated for the wealth they bring to their host nation…..and make no mistake, their presence is very positive: socially, politically and environmentally.

Funny, because we have been having rumblings of a similar nature here in Portugal…..too many foreigners from the East. What is particularly amusing, however, is that the second biggest Portuguese City is……wait for it……. Paris…..fekin Paris (yes that’s France), and I am not even going to mention London, Switzerland, New York, etc, etc….where there are many hundreds of thousands.

Let’s face it, we are in a One World situation and we all should be enjoying or suffering together. We can make this work but we have to understand the problems, not just from a one sided perspective, but from all sides.

We have to try to understand the core essence of the European project, not just listen or read snippets of extracts in the popular press. Surely you must understand this.

Invariably, people will tend to return to their homeland because that is where they feel best and want to be. With their families and their heritage.

Open your mind and understand that we have a great opportunity of make this Planet work…..it’s a unique Planet…..unique because it’s the only living Planet in our solar system……but we can only make this Planet work together. It just hurts to hear young people saying things like “The Problem With England is The Romanians”…..we don’t deserve this and surely they don’t deserve that.

Share This

Comments(0)

I have been travelling down (from Lisbon) to the Algarve quite a lot since the summer (of 2006) and I am always shocked how a nice people can be transformed into literally terrorist (in the true sense of the word) by the simple act of sitting in front of a steering wheel.

Now, we know that the statistics of accidents on the Portuguese make scary reading in any case. We actually top every list possible. And you can understand why, if you pick a good day to drive down…..or up from the Algarve.

We have to bear in mind that the speed limit is 120km per hour (which I have to admit is nonsense on parts of the trip) and the distance is approximately 250km from Lisbon, we should be counting on an average journey time is about 2 hours.

What actually happens is: this does not relate to Mercedes, Audi and BMW drivers. They have to attain a journey time of more like 1 hour and 15 minutes. Which means that if you are on the road at the same time as they are, you are literally forces (and I mean literally terrorised) to get out of their way, because speed limits do not include these drivers. And if you are unable to move over quick enough, they won’t mind overtaking on the inside lane. In fact, I have seen one Mercedes driver overtake on the inside of a three lane stretch.

But if, heavens forbid, these actually have an accident at these high speeds, which can very easily be 200km, they have a very good chance of walking away. Not the case with the cars they are trying to overtake…..the likes of Fords, Fiat, Renault, etc, which are not as “safe” as the super terrorists’ car.

However, you do get the suicide terrorist that try to drive their Ford, Fiat, Renault, etc, at the same speed as the super cars and this is really scary, as there is no way of survival should they have an accident.

My advice…..just get the hell out of their way…..or they are liable to kill the father of your son…..

Share This

Comments(0)